Tag Archives: Corbyn

A Quiet Revolution

6 Replies

We now have Andy Burnham as Prime Minister. He got off to a bad start with me when he promised a “circuit-breaker moment”. I’m guessing he’s not big on electrical work as the last time we had a circuit-breaker moment at home the freezer went off and the lights went out. Readers of a certain age may remember previous Labour governments where the lights (literally) went out and, in the Winter of Discontent, no bins were collected and people could not be buried.

As I’m not a great believer in party politics, I have to point out that the Conservative government also had trouble keeping the lights on.

I’m just saying that Burnham needs to look at getting a new speech writer. He needs all the help he can get as this is the man who came fourth in a leadership to Ed Milliband and lost his next one to Jeremy Corbyn. Ed Miliband, for those who don’t know, is to charisma what I am to the fitness industry. And Jeremy Corbyn makes me look positively modern in outlook. It’s a shame really, I like Corbyn because he has principles, despite it being an archaic and inconvenient concept.

He comes from a time when you could tell the difference between Conservatives and Labour. Now the only real difference is the cost of their suits, and as we saw when news about Starmer’s wardrobe surfaced, even that isn’t a sure-fire way to tell the difference these days.

I generally try to avoid politics, but sometimes I think I need to lay down a marker so a future student of politics can see what the man in the street really thinks of the clowns in power. Last time a man rose to power, wearing a big smile and promising a new style of politics it was Tony Blair. He’s a man who has, at times, been one of the most popular Prime Ministers we ever had, and also one of the least popular.  If you are bothered you can make your own mind up. I will merely say that in contrast to Jeremy Corbyn, I do not feel that Tony Blair is weighed down by principles.

No political pictures, as I don’t have any suitable ones and, to be honest, it’s a busy day. One look at Mallard and the world seems a better place.

Political Limericks and Other Poems

24 Replies

Warning, this post may include tedium. This is particularly true for overseas readers who may not recognise any of the names.

I was intending to write some political limericks last week, but haven’t been firing on all cylinders after being ill. A limerick, with five lines, two rhymes (AABBA) and anapestic meter is trickier than it looks. Even when my brain is replete with fish and purring like a sardine-stuffed cat, questions of metre have a tendency to take the shine off my day.

The answer I adopted, in line with my normal policy of lowering standards to match results, is to cut out all the difficult bits. That would suggest a clerihew, a form often used to make fun of famous figures. The rhymes are easy (AABB) and it has a sensibly easy-going view of line length and metre.

Theresa May

Gave a poll lead away

She lost her majority

and offended her sorority

or

Jeremy Corbyn

Rhymes with next to nothin’

A beardy, weirdy smarty

Who leads the Labour party

To be fair, I’m not sure how smart he is. As long as it isn’t libellous (and I’m pretty sure that accusing politicians of intelligence is not defamatory) I think I’m in the clear as accuracy doesn’t seem too important in clerihews.

Nicola Salmon

Has a tendency to bang on

About places north of the border

That sound a bit like Mordor

Other parties are available, but I can’t remember the names of any of the leaders.

I then had a look at senryu. They are like haiku but without the rules –  no cutting words, no season words and no nature. Seventeen syllables or less. You can include humour and human foibles. They are almost the limerick of Japanese poetry and, apart from throwing a selection of words on the table to see what happens, there can’t be many easier ways to write a poem.

Ripples of applause

A political speech

The sound of lyres

Sorry, it’s a cheap shot but I couldn’t resist.

As for my comment on throwing a selection of words on the table, there is a poet who does that at workshops. I forget her name but she was on Radio Four a couple of weeks ago when it was National Poetry Day. She travels the world with a big bag of words running poetry workshops in a career that makes professional cuddler look almost mainstream.