Tag Archives: Armageddon

A Deep Distrust

I hate computers.

I’ve been having trouble getting information from Ancestry UK, which is why the Heeley article wasn’t as well researched as it could have been. I had cleared my cache/browsing history as recommended but was putting the other actions off, as messing with computers is always bad news.

Tonight I deactivated my browser extensions. No, I haven’t a clue what they are, why they are necessary or why I ever needed them if I can, it seems, do without them.

Then, as that didn’t work, I downloaded a new version of Chrome. Probably. I’m not sure there is a new version for those of us running XP or Vista.

Anyway, after a wild white-knuckle ride of button pressing and trepidation I still have a functioning computer. I still don’t have a functioning Ancestry site and I’m having to enter passwords every time I visit a site, but it’s mostly working so thank goodness for small mercies. I’ve attempted things with computers that have ended far less well than this.

I always say I’ll make regular back-ups and all that stuff but I never do. It’s a serious worry that all over the world nuclear missiles are being controlled by computers, and computers are in a perpetual state of decay.  It starts with a gradual slowing, moves on to shedding various functions, like Ancestry, and ends up launching a missile at someone who retaliates automatically and triggers Armageddon.

grayscale photo of explosion on the beach

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

There is, of course, the possibility that computers hate me, which would explain a lot.

In an alternate universe, where they don’t trust computers they put the nuclear bombs under the care of highly trained teenage soldiers, who are likely to push the red button to see what happens. Or they may let computer geeks look after them. That’s unlikely to end well either.

While I’m here, did you know you can buy glow in the dark coins? I didn’t until someone asked if we wanted to buy one last week. We’ve had ones with copper from HMS Victory, bits of Avro Lancaster bomber and bits of meteorite embedded in them, even ascratch and sniff pizza coin, but never one that glowed in the dark.

They are advertised as “irradiated“, which is not the first word I would choose if I was trying to sell something. It’s close to “bubonic” and “carcinogenic” on the list of words you wouldn’t expect to see in an advert.

In the manner of these things, once I started looking I learned things I hadn’t realised I didn’t know. I had never heard of these, for instance.

An Ordinary Life

Yesterday started, as usual, with shillings. We’ve probably spoken about shillings enough. I’ve certainly sorted enough.

I then moved on to sorting out four boxes of  secondhand office supplies we’ve recently inherited from the estate of a local dealer. Although I like stationery, I don’t necessarily like it when it’s mixed up in a box. What with scissors, loose staples and a loose craft knife it was not a happy episode.

Finally I was able to get to the computer in the back office and start putting medallions on eBay. We have a large supply of medallions. I refer to them as “modern”, though to many people the 1970s and 80s are “before I was born”.

I’ve put 41 on in two days and sold 14 already.

Fortunately I am not an ambitious man.

Historical Note: When someone reads my blog 50 years from now to see what ordinary people were thinking about Syria in the run up to Armageddon they are going to have to conclude “not much”.

I’m not sure why we are involved. I’m not sure why the Russians are involved. And I’m not going to waste time worrying about it because there’s nothing I can do to change things.

I’m now going to make corned beef hash for tea.