2,900 seems like a nicely rounded number, though in just 99 posts from this one I will be celebrating number 3,000, which will be even rounder. At the moment this is also draft 88, another well-rounded number and known to bingo callers as “two fat ladies”. What junk I carry in my head . . .
I passed a Funeral Director’s branch office today. It has closed in Nottingham and is just operating from its Head Office in Mansfield. What sort of undertaker, I asked my mate, can possibly be doing badly during a pandemic? He says it’s because of the number of new companies advertising no-frills cremations. They cost about half the cost of a normal cheap funeral and you can pay in advance. The only trouble with paying in advance is that they might disappear with the money. That would be annoying.
He’s over 80 now and I am of an age that regularly appears in obituaries these days, so we both have an interest in the subject. I favour a simple cremation followed by my ashes being returned home by post. He, after great thought, has decided on an informal woodland burial. This involves me, a transit van and a shovel, plus a secluded bit of woodland with easy access to a parking spot. It’s not the poshest of funerals, but overheads are low. He wants to be buried with a Star Trek badge and a pocketful of Roman Coins. He doesn’t like Star Trek and isn’t particularly fond of Romans, but he really does dislike archaeologists!
You can also get ashes made into jewellery – anything from a small container to wear as a pendant, to a large artificial diamond (which is just carbon, like us after the cremation). If I’d know modern mourning jewellery was still in use, I would have made a collection of Georgian and Victorian mourning jewellery and used the bits with me in them as the final part of the collection.
I think that will do. I fell asleep last night and didn’t get round to posting this, so it’s time to post and then get going with a new day. There’s nothing like a discussion of death to remind me that I need to get on. This is my last Saturday off until summer, so I’m going to appreciate it. Back to work full time on Monday after a lazy few weeks!
I like your friend’s scheme a lot. My current plan is not to die so I have not considered a funeral scheme yet.
I think it’s a good plan, but when you spend a lot of time in the back of an antiques shop without seeing customers it doesn’t encourage the cheerful outlook that you Scots seem to cultivate. 🙂
The Detectorists have just made a note of your mate’s wishes.
🙂 I recently watched the Detectorists for the first time in years and was struck by the similarity between their conversations and the conversations I have.
Death is a big business. Always plenty of it going on, and now a no frills package to boot! Your friend’s wishes are certainly interesting. I had to look up the Detectorists. New one on me! 🙂
It’s about a bunch of losers with a pitiful hobby, disappointed dreams and boring small talk – it’s like looking in a mirror! They even talk about whether to refrigerate ketchup or not – one of my favourite subjects. 🙂
Your life sounds more interesting than that! 🙂
It’ all window dressing. I’m really rather dull.
I don’t think so. 🙂