Tag Archives: Tootlepedal

Hot!

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It’s hot by English standards, though I’m sure it’s just pleasantly warm by the standards of many other nations. Fresh from re-evaluating my ambitions to live in New Mexico (due to my growing concerns about the USA), I’m also rethinking the one about moving to Australia. Even in an air-conditioned bubble or a repurposed opal mine, I’m thinking it may be a bit hot for me.

Poppies growing from cracks in concrete

Other parts of the country are either hotter or cooler. Look at Derrick’s blog or Tootlepedal’s. They, I think, represent the two extremes today. Oh dear, I just looked at TP’s blog – he is in hospital after Mountain Rescue had to bring him down after a knee injury.

Not that it’s all bad news, I must “avoid strenuous activity during the hottest part of the day” according to official advice, (I am dedicated to taking that advice), and keep the house cool, whilst drinking plenty of fluids. It’s a good thing we have government to look after us, as I wouldn’t have thought about any of that by myself They also advise people not to leave babies, pets and old people alone in parked cars. Since when have I been reduced to the level of a child or pet?

I’ve actually spent most of the day wondering about one of the great philosophical questions of our times – how does Bradley Walsh get work as an actor? He’s a lovely bloke, I’m sure, and a great question master on The Chase and irs spin-offs. He’s done a number of high-profile roles in Coronation Street and Dr Who and today I’ve been watching him in Law and Order UK.

Poppies with a bee

It’s an adaptation of the American series. It’s OK, but a bit like the Toronto version it doesn’t sparkle quite so much once it’s taken out of its natural habitat, and, as I say, Bradley Walsh in a lead role isn’t quite doing it for me.

That was my day during the Big Heat. My blood test was done quickly today and I am back in the correct range after a dramatic rise caused by the anti-biotics of a few weeks ago. The TESCO checkout broke last night. I always suspect hot weather, though it may be foreign hackers or just inefficiency. They have made a few changes recently, which is never good news. At the moment we are being warned that there might not be enough electricity – high demand for powering fans linked to low levels of wind for the windmills. If we asked President Trump for his opinion on windmills he would generate the extra wind we need. Meanwhile, keep on with building devices to use wave energy. We have plenty of waves.

Poppies in wheat field

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And a Third Limerick

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I came close to using a Clerihew for Tootlepedal’s Festive Limerick but as I wrote Limericks about Derrick J Knight and the ladies I thought it was only fair to produce a third Limerick.

Originally I tried to force “Tootlepedal” into a line but I couldn’t. I’ve never been good at the metrical part of poetry but even I can tell it’s not a good word for a Limerick.

There was a Scots cyclist called Tootlepedal

(If you get this to scan, take a medal)

If only I dare shorten it to Tootle I could get him to pootle, but it’s probably safer not to do that. So that was how I left it.

I looked at several sites for help with scansion, and it wasn’t time wasted as it revealed that the Ancient Greeks believed a metrical foot should have an arsis and a thesis. (Plural arses and theses, honestly!) It’s not complicated humour, but let’s face it, I’m a simple man and I’m grinning as I type.

A little inventiveness and adaptation later I came up with this version.

A keen Scots cyclist called Tom,

cycles around with aplomb.

If he was Tommy,

it would rhyme with bonhomie,

which would be funny. But wrong.

I think this probably signals the end of my Limerick Season for this year. It’s a lot harder than writing Clerihews.