Tag Archives: random subjects

Random Thoughts

I pressed the button on the random subject generator and this was what came up – “What does getting old mean to you?”

It wasn’t what I was hoping for. I could have come up with that on my own. I had honestly meant to write on any subject that came up, but as many of my posts are already on that subject I thought I’d try again.

So I tried again.

“Write about your feet.”

I am very tempted, but it would include thoughts about arthritis and about getting old so, again, it’s nothing new.

One last try.

“Write your obituary.”

You know, I sometimes wonder if the world really does hate me. I have recently had to help with my father’s obituary and I could have done without a reminder. It was bad enough this morning when someone came into the shop to buy a Father’s Day present. I’ll be cheerful again tomorrow, but for tonight I’ll pass.

So, one last try.

“What has made you angry recently?”

That’s easy, the random subject generator has been winding me up for the last half hour. I could, given another hair’s breadth of provocation, really let rip on the subject of random subject generators. It’s not much of a thing to get worked up about but it will do for the moment.

There other things to get worked up about but I’ll leave you with a quote.

“Mashonaland is ours, we conquered it, and have every right to be here…”

This could so easily be a quote from Cecil Rhodes, but it’s actually a quote from Umgandan, a Matabele induna.

Whatever today’s revisionists may think, not all the invaders in Africa were white.

 

 

 

Random Subject – Swimming

I thought I’d try a random subject today, and the subject of swimming came up.

Unfortunately I know nothing about swimming, but if I ignore the prompt there’s no point in generating it.

I haven’t been swimming for around forty years, and unless I find myself on a sinking ship I have no intention of swimming again. It’s like skydiving – unless the aeroplane is on fire I’m not going to jump out of it.

I’ve probably forgotten how to swim by now anyway.

Even if I haven’t forgotten how to swim, and assuming I wanted some gentle exercise, I’m not going to expose myself to ridicule and the possibility of an attempted rescue by Greenpeace.

It’s also time to remove most of the swimming from the Olympics. In 2020 there will be 35 swimming events in the pool. If you are good at swimming you can easily end up with half a dozen medals. If you are good at riding a bike it will take a couple of Olympics to get that many. And if you are a rower it will take 16 years to get five medals.

Somehow it doesn’t seem fair.

Sir Steve Redgrave has five golds for rowing in five consecutive Olympics, and is only our fourth most successful Olympian – beaten by Sir Chris Hoy, Jason Kenny and Sir Bradley Wiggins. He had to win one every four years, and couldn’t have a bad day. The last three are all cyclists, in case you didn’t know. They won multiple medals for pedalling quickly round a track on something my mother used to use for going shopping on.

I’d be more impressed if they did their events with a basket on the and a load of shopping piled up in it. Rowers could also take a fishing rod.

So, to summarise. Swimming. Too many Olympic events. Cut them all back so athletes are operating on a level playing field. Redesign the cycling and rowing events, and introduce a pursuit category to the swimming.

It would be like a normal swimming event but just after the swimmers dive in…

…you release the shark.