Tag Archives: jobs

Study Number 1 - The Idiot

Counting Blessings and Locking Down

I just had a message from LinkedIn asking if I know Julia Wilson and telling me that “You and Julia have 1 mutual connection in common.”

This is wonderful news. After half a lifetime of marriage and two kids, you might start to look at your partner and wonder what you have in common. I’m sure Julia does. I am not the man she married, and even I don’t know when I changed. Actually, I’m literally not the man she married as most of me is less than 10 years old. I don’t think I need to add more.

Now we know – we have a mutual connection in common on LinkedIn and a chance to be sarcastic about social media and the possibilities of having a mutual connection that we don’t have in common. When I see things like that I always suspect the writer was being paid by the word. I saw another thing I hate earlier today. I was reading a publisher’s blurb that told me the poet in question wrote very unique poems.

Well, for one thing, if they weren’t unique that would be plagiarism, not poetry. And once you are unique, how can you be more unique than that?

LinkedIn, for those of you that don’t know is a social media site where you go to lie about your CV and, supposedly, to find new jobs. I’ve been on it a few years and so far no new job has been offered. I can’t get on it at the moment to alter my profile because, like WordPress, it’s part of the international robot techno-conspiracy to refuse me service due to the inadequacy of my computer equipment.

Catch-22 in action – I can’t replace my computer equipment because I don’t have a proper job, and I can’t get a proper job because I need a better computer.

That’s not quite true, of course. In reality, I can’t get a proper job because I’m close to retirement age, have no qualifications and, quite frankly, have a bad attitude. After years of self-employment I find I don’t like bosses, don’t like co-workers and don’t really care for customers much. I do, however, like being paid regularly, and that tends to keep me in line.

Anyway, it’s possible that there is no better job and, to be fair, there probably aren’t any better bosses and co-workers around, particularly in jobs which allow me to mess about with coins and medals all day.

And now that I’m being paid by the government to have a month off I really can’t see much of a downside to being employed.


One for Tootlepedal

As requested by Tootlepedal, here is the picture I took of a long-tailed tit yesterday. They flit through the treetops, squeaking to each other and never settling long in one spot. I didn’t have my big camera with me and the one I did have was set for flowers in close-up so it is a very bad shot. I put it here just to show that long-tailed tits, though beautiful birds, are not easy to photograph. I will then add, if I can find them, a few more shots taken over the years which are slightly better.

Poor shot of a long-tailed tit

Poor shot of a long-tailed tit

Even the miracle of modern photo editing can’t make this into anything but a comedic failure. Small equipment allied to poor technique do not produce good results, as Julia has often mentioned.

I don’t seem to be doing too well finding the shots of long-tailed tits, though I know I have a few. Try these instead. Here’s one from  The Marmalade Police and other stories…


I will look for more tonight but I have to go to work now – packing parcels and answering phone calls from people who are about to have their dreams shattered.

Number One son is back from his raid on Leeds. He has fixed up a flat and done his first job interview but is bemoaning the fact that he might have to take a boring job. I didn’t like to explain that this is normal. The job openings for International Playboys and Unicorn Trainers are very limited.


I’ve been struggling today. It’s not that I’m short of subjects, but they are either not suitable, need more work or need photographs. (I have many of the photos I need, but can’t get the card reader to work).

It’s the same with time – I had a list of jobs to do and I’ve been behaving like a startled rabbit. The result is that I made more mess than I started with. Julia  brought back three wooden boxes from her friendly fruit stall, so we now also have more clutter than when we started.

In the end I decided that I’m the only one that demands daily posts so why make my own life a misery with deadlines?

In the end, at 11.59, I pressed the button, loaded the post and then carried on editing.

Am I the only one who does this, making a rod for my own back?

Please tell me I’m not…



The coming year

Today I have been thinking of the coming year.

We are having a casual January to clear the farm and to set things in perspective. In February I will have to start doing things…

I’m likely to have more time on my hands in 2017 because, as Julia has pointed out in a kind yet firm way,  I’m unemployable. Age, size and lack of formal qualifications are all against me, and that’s before you consider that I’m rude, lazy and look like I’ve dressed in the dark. When looking at job adverts I have noticed that these qualities are not often requested.

On the other hand I do have my own tools and an estate car. If there’s nothing in prospect by spring I can always go gardening again, though I will be more selective with my clients this time. No gardens with steep slopes and steps, for instance.

Extra time is not all bad, as it will give me more time to shop and cook, resulting in us eating food that is better and cheaper. We will also probably lose weight, particularly me if I am doing more gardening. Time, I think, to rearrange our neglected garden on Permaculture principles. I might be poor but I’ll be healthy, and full of fibre.

Work-wise I need something to keep the wolf from the door for the next nine years, at which point I will be able to draw my pension.  Just nine years? Where did it all go?

I’m currently exploring a range of dead-end options to occupy my time until that day arrives.


One of my favourite farm photos – think in terms of stormy weather or pots of gold.

(To be continued…)