Tag Archives: boring

Nothing Much of Note

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I nearly fell asleep at work today. In fact, if I’m accurate I did fall asleep several times, but only for seconds at a time.  No window, no ventilation and nothing to keep my interest (I was entering long lists of dull coins onto eBay) and the result was easy to foresee. I kept jerking into wakefulness and not quite knowing where I was in the process. This is not what they pay me for, so I should do better.

The first part of my evening was spent asleep in a chair and the second part was spent making and eating salad. It’s time to get back to a sensible diet. I have an appointment in a month’s time and my weight is likely to come up in the discussion. I would liken it to the elephant in the room, but that would merely emphasise my tendency to excess poundage. perhaps I should begin dressing in grey.

Very little of note has happened. I have organised a day off so that I can take Julia to a training course (Mencap seems to think everyone has a car and can travel 20 miles across country by 9am). That has been the only thing of note.

I’ve been loking at houses in Country Life on-line. It’s not a good thing to do. I note several of them have cinema rooms. I have enough problems staying awake in an armchair in the light. Put me in a cinema chair in the dark and no good will come of it . . .

Dabchick, Gibraltar Point, Lincolnshire

Becoming Boring

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I’m currently watching Angela Lansbury on TV. To be honest it’s difficult to watch TV and avoid it. She is 95 soon and they will be celebrating with a week of Murder She Wrote. I’m not quite sure how it will differ from every other week, but I wish her well.

The day has gone quickly, and we have resisted the temptation to go out and do some last-ditch mingling. If more people had resisted the temptation to mingle we wouldn’t be in this mess. Skegness has been on the news today asking people from Nottingham not to visit. From what we saw a few weeks ago (crowds of people with a lack of masks and social distancing) I wouldn’t want to visit, even if there was something worth doing when you get there.

Really, it’s all the same as previous days, just another link in a chain of tedium.

I always used to tell the kids that only boring people got bored. This, I suspect, means that I am becoming boring. That is not good news, as I don’t want to be boring and old. The latter, to be fair, is inevitable, but I feel there should be an element of choice about the former. I’m going to have to do something about that. I might have to start racing pigeons or talking to myself in the park.

Of course, these days it is not a sign of madness to speak to yourself in the street, just a sign that you have a bluetooth headset.

Or have a tattoo in a foreign language – I will get an appallingly rude word tattooed on my arms in Chinese script and will tell everyone it says “destiny”. Of course, it may be tricky explaining why I keep being ejected from Chinese Restaurants.

 

Sea Buckthorn

Rambling Mind

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I noticed something interesting on Wednesday, which I forgot to mention. When I stopped at the petrol station to fill up and put air in my tyres I found that the air pump takes cards. This is new. It takes a minimum of 50p, where it used to take smaller coins, but that is hardly a surprise as it’s the norm for everything to go up. It’s only surprising that it hasn’t gone up to £1 minimum.

It’s all part of the drive towards a dehumanised cashless society.

Eventually, with all payments being electronic and all shops having loyalty cards I’m sure the Government will take the opportunity to start poking its nose into our spending and resting habits.

How long before my weekly shop is greeted with red lights and klaxons and an automated message: “Put that cake back, fatty, and buy some crispbreads.”

It’s a chilling vision of the future.

My problems, as listed a few days ago, are decreasing. This isn’t because I’ve actually solved any of them, just that I’ve stopped worrying. I’ve already bored workmates, sister and wife by moaning about the boundary dispute at the bottom of the garden, so I won’t add my blog readers to the list. Anyway, it’s not as if my back garden fence is going to need a UN intervention, and despite some elevated rhetoric from the neighbour, I can’t see it escalating into actual warfare.

Unfortunately, the dispute is taking too much of my attention and I’m finding writing is dragging, so will sign off now and look for a random photo to use. I have decided on the sea buckthorn from Skegness on our last trip to the coast.

If you came into a large amount of money, what would you do with it?

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I came up empty for inspiration so I turned to a random subject generator.

When you look at the prompt you have to wonder if the effort was worth it.

I would buy a Ford Mustang. Probably a red one but maybe yellow or gunmetal. Then I’d plant a forest to allow for the emissions. After that I suppose I’d better buy an electric car and show some maturity.

Then I’d buy a house near the coast.Or build one. Building one might be better as I could have all the bits and pieces I’d always wanted – a secure hobby room, a fridge with locks on,  a bike shed (I’ll be needing some exercise) and servants’ quarters. Well, I’m not going to be doing my own housework if I’ve got money, am I?

Perhaps I would donate some money to charity.  It will make me seem less shallow and more compassionate.

I’d also like to go deep sea fishing off Florida. I saw a programme about that once and it looked fun.

That’s about it. I’m currently shallow and boring. With money I’ll be shallow and boring and rich. It hardly seems worth the bother.

 

The Posts That Never Were

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For some reason I’m totally out of things to say.

This is strange because I’m sure I have a list of subjects somewhere. I also have 15 part written drafts. All they need is a blogger with a work ethic to finish them off.

I say “finish them off” but in at least two cases all I have is a title. Two of the others are just pictures.

Pondering, Polishing and Plagiarising, for instance, has been waiting for 300 finely crafted words since 4th April 2016. Unfortunately, as I like the title so much, I haven’t felt any of my attempts have been good enough.

Cooking with Harissa has only been ready since June this year. I wrote it after using harissa for the first time. I used it as a marinade for chicken and really enjoyed it. Unfortunately I didn’t take any photos and I haven’t made it again (I found an easier recipe I preferred). This is a shame, as I was going to pretend that Harissa was a celebrity chef from North Africa.

There are also several I’ve decided are too contentious.

British Values is one of them. There are, it seems, four core values that we should be ramming down the throats of school children. This becomes five when they put them on a poster depicting a hand, thus illustrating another core British value – messing about with education. Don’t get me started.

There are others, but they are too contentious even to blog about why I won’t blog about them.

That’s just the highlights – others are in limbo because they are boring – I have saved you from them.

Book Review: History Without the Boring Bits

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History Without the Boring Bits

by Ian Crofton

Quercus (2007) This edition 2015

Paperback 362 pp  £9.99

ISBN-10: 1847240860

ISBN-13: 978-1847240866

Not so much a title as a challenge. I’m not sure I can resist it. Having read a previous book of Crofton’s on food, I wasn’t expecting too much but it was reduced to £2.99 so there wasn’t much to risk.

The food book was very basic, and a few hours on the internet would have given you most, if not all the information. This one is a step up from that, seeming to cram a lot more in. Unfortunately a succession of interesting snippets doesn’t make for an interesting book. I’d like to see fewer entries, with a bit more information about each one. Apart from the bits I already know, there are many entries that aren’t particularly interesting, and some that are just unpleasant. (To my mind he seems overly fond of mutilation.)

So, referring back to the challenge contained in the title, no it hasn’t missed all the boring bits out. It’s a good book to dip into, but sometimes you may have to skim before finding a gem.  I was pleased with it after my earlier experience with the food book, though still a little ambivalent, and have just ordered another of his books from Amazon. It cost me £2.81 including postage and packing so even if it’s rubbish it’s not a great loss.

I’ll let you know what happens.