I just hovered over the top photo in the last post, to see if I’d used it before. I pressed “Search Google for Image” and came up with this page. The first line includes a missing homeless man, five murderers or sexual miscreants and a man arrested for urinating on a hospital floor. My first thought was, I admit, that he must have a considerably better prostate than I do.
My second thought was that I need to put some serious thought into my personal grooming.
The next line of six includes the victim of an assault, an author of books on relationships, several murderers/sex offenders and a man who castrated a man he met via a shared interest on a eunuch website. The sheriff, commenting on the case said “It’s kinda nuts…” I promise you I could not make this stuff up.
Line three includes Alec Guiness as Obi Wan Kenobi, a homeless man, two criminals and two stock photos of “Old Man and Beard”. Further down there is, amongst the criminals and stock photos, an advert for a “realistic old man mask – $350” so there is some good news, as I seem to have saved myself $350.
I really don’t know what to say. You would have thought there would be some poets or Eminent Victorians amongst any Google selection of old men with beards. I don’t know what the site would make of Michael Cusack or Charles Darwin.
However, I am shortly going to know what it makes of Derrick Knight because I can’t resist the temptation. It will probably bring up a list of retired academics, but there’s always a chance it will throw up a nugget of comedy gold.
Well, isn’t that just typical? I get a roll call of sex offenders, Derrick gets Henry Winkler, Griff Rhys Jones, Prince Philip, Prince Charles and his stock photos are “Happy Old Man” some are even just “Happy Man”. Does he really look younger than me? There are, as predicted, some academics in there. And Richard Branson…
I did the search Google thing on the photo above and it turned up a page that was nearly identical, though not quite so bad, until I found a link from one of the photos to “Pictures of Creepy Old Guys Smiling”. Frankly I am very disappointed with Google. Quite apart from the other factors, I am clearly not smiling.