As I sat on the edge of the bed to put my socks on (yes, old age is catching up on me) I ran a scene from my imaginary life through my head. It was the one where I appear on BBC Breakfast after winning a major poetry award and impress a watching TV executive so much that I am offered a chance to have my own TV show, wandering round the countryside talking and eating in tearooms.
There would, inevitably, be a string of offers to appear in other TV work, followed by a celebrity lifestyle and a book contract. Obviously, a man who has to sit down to put his socks on isn’t going to be doing Strictly Come Dancing or I’m a Celebrity… but I’d be happy to do Celebrity Gogglebox. When it comes to sitting round watching TV and talking rubbish, I flatter myself that I have few equals.
I was sitting in a studio, putting forward the idea that I was the Jackson Pollock of poetry, just throwing words at pieces of paper, when a sudden (and unusual) profound thought came into my mind.
“As soon as I get downstairs,” I thought, “I will write that down. There is the basis for a scholarly essay in there and it will establish me as a leading light in the poetry establishment.”
Well, that’s what it would have sounded like if I thought that way. What I actually thought was “Oooo!” That’s pretty much the reality of my thinking. If you add the word “shiny” that covers 90% of my thoughts these days. I know I’m supposed to think about sex every seven seconds according to the research, but frankly, I can’t fit it in. (Yes, I’ve been watching too many Carry On films over Christmas…)
Talking of thinking, I found this article very interesting. Before you read it, think of a white bear, and don’t click the link until you’ve finished thinking about it. When you stop thinking about the white bear and read the article, all will become clear.
Anyway, I got downstairs (another thing that I used to take for granted but which takes a bit of thought these days) and Julia was making porridge. She put sliced banana and blueberries in it because she thinks I should eat more fruit. And, as I ate the delicious fruity porridge, I realised that I had forgotten the rare and precious thought.
And that, so far, is the story of 2021. I had, as you can probably guess, no picture of porridge with fruit in it, so I offer a picture of plums instead.
I’m with Helen. Doesn’t everyone?
I do now. I used to hop around on one foot and pull them on. But I was young and foolish and in a hurry.
I did the white bear thing you suggested before clicking on the link and that study sounds like absolute rubbish. lol
It’s so lovely to have a loved one who will cook for you and make it delicious as well as good for you. Hugs to you both, and hoping for a Happy New Year for both of you.
🙂 I wondered if anyone would do it. Happy New Year to you too.
At least you have remembered that you have forgotten a lot of interesting thoughts. I don’t have any interesting thoughts to start with.
You need a notebook. If you start writing “No interesting thoughts today” you’ll find you start getting interesting thoughts. It’s like me writing “Don’t eat chips today.” I become obsessed with chips…
Is sitting down a sign of increasing age! I think I’ve always done this 🤔
I meant sitting down to put your socks on! I’ve always done this.
Bananas and blueberries in nice hot porridge sound like a good start to the day, Quercus. The cats do no give me a chance to put my socks on before howling for breakfast. If I shut the door, Lucio puts his mouth down to the crack at the bottom of the door and blasts a loud howl under the door. We hear hm, loud and clear. He is better than an alarm clock, and I m guessing was elected by the others to give the breakfast howl, being the loudest and most successful howler of he lot. 🙂
Theer is little as heartrending as the howl of a cat who thinks you are late with the food…
You can’t go wrong with bananas and blueberries. Or having inspiration strike as you put on your socks while sitting on the bed. Happy New Year!
Happy New Year to you too, plus Clif and the kids. Hope it all goes better this year.