After the Lord Mayor’s Show…

I don’t know if the expression used in the title will be familiar to some of my overseas readers. It is often rendered as “After the Lord mayor’s Show comes the dustcart.” I assume it has been bowdlerised over the years, as the material collected after the show was clearly horse manure and not dust.

To sum up our day- seaside, egrets, owl,marshes, magic. And so Act One ends with out happy couple heading off into the sunset…

Actually it’s a bit early for sunset but the sun is falling and there is a hint of colour in the sky.

The conversation is interrupted by a “Ping!” and a warning light on the dashboard. It was the one that warns about a tyre losing pressure. No big worry, as they do it regularly and you have to pump them up.However, I did wonder…

I reset it. My reasoning is that if it doesn’t go again for weeks there isn’t a problem, but if it sounds again in a day or two you have a slow puncture.

Twenty miles later, it sounded again. By this time we were back in Sutton on Sea and I pulled into the Car park and called Green Flag. After the debacle of our last wheel change I didn’t want to risk it in a deserted car park in the growing dusk. (Actually it was nearly 4.30, so not quite night but getting uncomfortably close for a man with poor form in recent tyre changes.

I decided to walk down to the toilet as we’d had several drinks on the trip, and found that they were locked. It was 4.31, which is how I know the time.. I just checked – most of the toilets round there are locked at 4.00, apart from the ones that are locked on Sundays and the ones that are locked all winter. It can’t be an economy measure as the lights were still on in the locked toilets.

I think it’s just a way of inconveniencing elderly visitors.

Fortunately, by the time I got back to the car and took the spare out, the man from Green Flag arrived. This is top quality service, as well as being a lot cheaper than the AA.

We were soon back on four wheels and 200 yards later we were outside the chip shop. The darkened, closed chip shop. After a number of average visits it’s only the fact we’ve been going there for 30 years that keeps us going. They really are pushing their luck. I’d been looking forward to chips too.

We went further down the coast. It was dark by the time we reached Skegness and selected KFC for our meal. It’s good, reliable, has toilets and a car park. And it isn’t McDonald’s. McDonald’s are OK for snacks but this was our evening meal. We do not have high standards…


Wicked Zinger Meal – why can’t they just call it a chicken sandwich meal?

It would be nice to report that we had an excellent meal and an uneventful trip home. We did have a good meal, mostly, but that will be another post. We didn’t quite have an uneventful journey home.

The conversation went like this.

“You should have stopped picking your nose fifty years ago.”

“I was clearing an obstruction in my nasal passages.”

“You’re disgusting.”

“Do you have any tissues?”

Rustling in bag.

“No, but I’ve got a spare serviette from KFC.”

Sometimes, when you are driving, you just can’t manage a decent nose blow to clear your nasal passages and a good prod has to suffice. Unfortunately, when you are on Warfarin, a good prod can result in copious bleeding and a lecture on the habits of small boys and grown men being far too much alike.

We saw another owl later. First we saw the reflected light of its eyes as it flew across the road in front of us, then again as it turned towards us for a better look, which also enabled us to the the dumpy brown shape of what was probably a Tawny Owl. which isn’t a bad finalย memory of the day. With any luck, when we look back, we may forget that I had a serviette stuffed up my nose at the time.

9 thoughts on “After the Lord Mayor’s Show…

  1. The Belmont Rooster

    Ahhh. Here it is. ๐Ÿ™‚ Fifty years of picking your nose? LOL! Hopefully, this wasn’t the first time she complained about it. There are a few annoying things in life we have to take care of no matter what else we are doing or where we are. If there is something in your nose, by all means, it must be remedied. It never fails, when there is a church dinner, my nose always starts running as I eat. I have to get up and go to the restroom sometimes more than once during the meal. Then the subject comes up about noses running while eating. At our age, bad habits aren’t bad habits anymore. It is just our normal behavior. Our loved ones love us anyway. ๐Ÿ™‚

    1. quercuscommunity

      No, it’s sadly not the first time. ๐Ÿ™‚ My nose has developed a life of its own over the last few years, and is not the organ it used to be, so I sympathise with your nose problems.

  2. Pingback: Scone Chronicles – 32 – It’s KFC | quercuscommunity

    1. quercuscommunity

      Julia has threatened to confiscate it. She is mortified that I could tell the whole world of my immaturity and lack of finesse.

      I think she over-estimates the reach of the blog, and the fact tat my immaturity and lack of finesse are already well known to my readers. ๐Ÿ™‚


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