The last few days have been crowded with subjects to write about. The trouble is that there is just too much, I am feeling quite tetchy about a lot of it and it’s hard to write a post in those circumstances. It’s the opposite of writer’s block in many ways – plenty to write about, plenty of words coming through, but just so much to say I can’t process it all.
I went to the random subject generator to help me concentrate, and this is what it came back with –
Write about your relationship with food.
You know it isn’t your day when even the random subject generator is having a pop at you.
I carry, as you may have gathered over the years, a few extra pounds. I say “a few” – it might be a bit more than that. In fact I could probably do with losing weight equivalent to the bodyweight of an average jockey.
However, this is supposed to be about my relationship with food, not my relationship with small people who ride horses. I like jockeys, but couldn’t eat a whole one…
I don’t really have much of a relationship with food; it’s never around long enough for me to get to know it.
When I gave up smoking I did so by telling myself how disgusting it was every time I smelt cigarette smoke. It seems to have worked as, twenty years later, I am still off cigarettes.
I’m not sure it would work as well with food. I’m worried that if I made myself think of food as disgusting I might end up with an eating disorder. To be fair, it would take a few years before the weight loss became a problem, but you have to be careful about these things.
To avoid buying new clothes I could buy braces to keep my trousers up, which is something I’ve been considering anyway – it’s a middle-aged man thing. (That’s suspenders to you Americans, though suspenders are something different to us.) Very different.
I do love the way English differs from one side of the Atlantic to the other. The mental picture of middle-aged American men wearing suspenders is both amusing and horrifying.
I think I’ll leave it there and add some pictures of food.
Between writing “pictures of food” and actually posting the pictures I managed to fall asleep and wake up just after midnight to find I’d missed a day posting. Just as I thought I was doing so well…