Yesterday morning when we left the house the day was beautiful – just the right temperature with a bright blue sky and a goldfinch perched incongruously on a TV aerial singing its heart out.
I wasted the rest of the day labouring on a computer in a windowless back room thinking of freedom and foolproof ways to kill my co-workers. This isn’t time wasted as it will eventually become the plot for one of my planned series of crime novels. The motive still needs work – nobody is going to believe that someone is murdered because he keeps moving the scissors – but I am being pushed to the edge. The only thing that prevents a fatal stabbing at the moment is the fact I can never find the bloody scissors.
What a contrast with today.
I stuck my head out of the door into a gloomy world with a low grey sky and only the chatter of a magpie to serve as a soundtrack. Even that stopped before I reached the car. No doubt it had found something small and defenceless to eat.
Wednesday is my day off but today was not to be filled with fun because it is MOT day. Actually, yesterday was MOT day, but because I’m a poor organiser it didn’t get done. Yesterday it had a new windscreen to replace the one that was cracked in Stoke on Trent as that sort of damage means a fail in the test.
Have I really being procrastinating for six months? That’s world class procrastination.
Fortunately the law allows you to drive without a valid MOT certificate as long as you are driving directly to a test station to keep a previously booked appointment.
They rang me just before lunch to tell me it had failed despite the new screen. It seems that one of the tyres I didn’t replace after the holiday had failed because of damage to the inner side-wall. It’s now cost me £325 for 3 tyres, the excess for the windscreen insurance and the MOT. Car ownership is starting to look like an expensive hobby.
They rang just after lunch to tell me it was ready, but when I stuck my head out of the door it was pouring down. I’d been typing in the dining room and hadn’t noticed. It was heavy, blustery and constant.
Half an hour later it was still blustery and constant, but it was heavier. And my coat was in the car. I have another coat. Unfortunately that was also in the car. My habit is to wear a coat while I am outside, walk back to the car, put it in the car and then walk into the house without the coat. This means I always have a coat with me when we go out.
It also means that, having failed to take the hint offered by the morning’s grey sky, I had walked home without a coat. It’s only quarter of a mile. Who needs a coat for that distance?
Fortunately I do have a third coat. Unfortunately, I’ve had it a while and I can no longer fasten it. I’ve noticed this with clothes. As they get older they seem to get smaller.
So, to summarise. Heavy rain, gusting wind. Coat that won’t fasten. Nothing for it but to grit my teeth and walk. At least my back will stay dry, I thought.
That’s where my new haircut came into play. With a newly shaved head there is nothing to impede rain as it runs off your shiny scalp and down your neck.
Later that day we went shopping. I checked my lottery tickets and found I had won £2.70.
Some days you think fate is laughing at you.
Other days you are certain it is.
There will be better days ahead, Quercus. 🙂
That is true. We are off to see my Dad and sister tomorrow, which will be good, though I’ll probably be thrashed at dominoes!
£2.70 x 10 would have been nice – almost covered the car expenses. I wonder how much I’m going to get fleeced when I take my car in. Last year, at a different garage they changed a tyre but put the wrong size on. Sadly, I noticed too late. Happily, they didn’t change the other three and they were wrong about all of them having low treads. Yes, expensive hobby!
That’s not acceptable for a supposedly professional business. You trust them and they should at least get the simple things right,
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You could consider buying your own pair of scissors and put them on a chain around your neck. Not an iron chain because that would get rusty when it rains!
He’s on holiday next week. I’m going to superglue the scissors to his desk. We have at least five pairs in the shop and he needs to use them all in rotation, putting each set down where he last used it. The concept of putting things back where he found them is a mystery to him, as is the idea of shutting a drawer after opening it.
Love the ending about fate – how true!!
Thank you. 🙂
It wasn’t just fate laughing at you. One of your most hilarious, my friend
Thank you Derrick. One of my wettest too, I have to say. 🙂
Oh dear,oh dear, oh dear! What a day!
I always thought hats were to prevent sunburn or to keep you warm – now I’m going to start wearing hats to divert the rain from my collar.
My husband wears hats for such a purpose 🙂
A wise man. Such wisdom is hard won. 🙂
🙂
Well it is always extremely cheering to find that someone else is worse off than you so you have performed a public service for many with this post, Quercus.
Excessive repair and test bills were behind my new car purchase as I reckoned I would be saving more money than I was getting for my savings. Now I just need to avoid damaging the tyres.
It’s always good to feel that a day hasn’t been wasted, and if I have cheered a Scotsman up it is a red letter day indeed.
I am already thinking about our next car as this was a rushed purchase and although it is generally good I would not have bought one which took such expensive tyres.
Ah, well! At least a shaved head dries easily.